“B GR8FUL”

November 25, 2015 | Julie Hall

The license plate on the car in front of me during a long stretch of monotonous highway read, “B GR8FUL.” I couldn’t help but wonder if this was a personal reminder to me, or if it was meant for all who read it, spreading a positive message during what seem to be nutty, uncertain times. All one has to do is turn on the news and feel that terrible “ugh” inside.

My husband and daughter were snoozing in the car, and I was pensive as usual behind the wheel, thinking about everything from the economy, to family, to work, to you name it. I, like many of you, am worried about the state of our world and economy and where it will leave the different generations in the years to come. Both young and old alike have many pressures these days.

I worry about my daughter’s future, which is probably normal for parents to feel. I worry about my clients who are facing hard times, due to health or financial problems. I seem to worry about things that I realize none of us have control over. For me, I have found it best to stay close to family, dear friends, and my faith.

The worries seemed endless while I was driving. Then I saw this simple license plate: “BGR8FUL.” There was an instant calm when I saw it, and I know that I needed to take those worries and transfer them into appreciation for all that we do have. Because when you step back and look at the grand scheme of things, we really do have for very much to be “gr8ful” for.

GR8FUL

Blessings to you and your family this Thanksgiving, from my family and me.

Julie Hall, The Estate Lady®, is the foremost national expert on personal property in estates, including liquidating, advising, and appraising. http://www.TheEstateLady.com She is also the Director of American Society of Estate Liquidators®, the national educational and resource organization for estate liquidation. http://www.aselonline.com.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.

Nostalgia is Not Hereditary

November 6, 2015 | Julie Hall

Why on earth do we hold on to so much stuff that we never use or even want? That is the million dollar question! As time goes on, I see more and more people holding on to items from estates, that they don’t really need, and truth be told, don’t really want either.

It is natural to have emotional attachments to objects in grandmother’s home, our own parents’ home, or to anyone dear to us who has passed away. These emotions can be deeply anchored to memories of cherished people, places, and special times; it becomes a priority to preserve these memories after they go.

Sometimes, we can go overboard and start keeping things for ourselves, our kids and grandchildren, who may not be interested in them at all.

If you only take one thing away from today’s blog, let it be this:

Emotional attachment does not guarantee a transference of emotion from one generation to the next generation. The relationship between a grandmother and grandchild is different than that of a mother and child, and so on. Each subsequent generation will most likely not feel the same emotional tug that you might. It is important to realize this and to accept it.

When you do not accept this and you continue to hold onto things that take up a great deal of space, and don’t mean much to the children or heirs, you become a storage facility for your family. In addition, a new and unpleasant situation will arise where the next generation (the one that doesn’t desire these items to begin with) must now bear the burden of dealing with the stuff after we leave this earth.

I can virtually guarantee they will not care for these items the way you do, and often are upset and resentful when having to sell or discard them. When this happens, hasty decisions are made to “just get rid of it.”

Choose only your favorite things and let the rest go.

Future generations will be most appreciative.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.

A New Take on “Taking”

October 23, 2015 | Julie Hall

Tips for Letting Go When Handling an Estate

There’s nothing simple or easy about letting go, especially when you are handling the estate of a loved one. People have the tendency to keep too much from the estate. They often find comfort in the things and the memories attached to them.

Being able to let go:

brings closure and peace of mind
minimizes family and marital strife
prevents future worries when your children are burdened with the same stuff
help avoid storage costs
prevents cluttering your own home

When you keep too much:

You realize you no longer need what you kept.
Your own home becomes overwhelmed with stuff.
Storage costs far outweigh the value of what is stored.
Your kids and grandkids don’t want what you selected to keep for them.
You may experience guilt. “Mom would be so upset if I sold that.” or “Mom said it was valuable so I should keep it.” Escort guilt to the door. Life is hard enough without the burden of needless guilt.

What do YOU want?

It’s perfectly acceptable to let go of possessions, especially if you don’t absolutely cherish them. If no one in the family wants the items, have an estate sale professional sell to those who will cherish them like mom and dad did. Unfortunately, families rarely get to see how happy new buyers are when they find these items. I’d much rather have someone who can appreciate the items, than to keep them stuffed in boxes taking up space in my home … unappreciated.

TIPS

Don’t keep items just because. Ask yourself if you really need it and have a purpose for it.
Record a video of the estate as it was when your loved one lived there.
Photographs are a great idea to preserve the memories without hanging on to the stuff.
Give to those less fortunate. Maybe your loved one had a favorite charity. Even if you have an estate sale, arrange for the estate sale professional to donate the items that do not sell.
Be honest and realistic. Will you really use this item? Why are you keeping it?
Set healthy boundaries and realize that space is a limiting factor.
If the estate needs to pay off debt, take as little as possible, so the remainder can be sold by a professional and proceeds applied to the debt.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.

Letting Go of Our Possessions is Hard

October 8, 2015 | Julie Hall

Most of us enjoy hearing the words, “Till death do us part,” during a wedding ceremony, where the new couple is floating in bliss and envision being by each other’s side until death separates them. From my perspective, I see people who have a very passionate relationship with their material possessions, sometimes more so than with each other. It almost appears that they believe they can take their possessions with them when they leave earth.

For over two decades, I have tried to figure out why people have such a difficult time letting go. Often it’s the Depression Era generation that has accumulated the most stuff. Their parents did not have much and probably possessed mostly utilitarian items during that era. The Depression Era generation absorbed what their parents owned. The Boomers have much more stuff to deal with, but they have only so much space to keep things.

Here are some thoughts on why people hold on to so much. Where do you see yourself in these thoughts?

You just never know when I’m going to need this.
There are so many uses for this possession.
If I hold onto it long enough, it will become valuable.
It is already old, so it must be valuable.
I did without as a child; I will not do without again.
It was a gift and I will honor the giver by keeping it.
The more I leave the kids, the more they will have.
I worked very hard for these things and I will pass them down.
The things bring comfort and familiarity.
All these things make me feel close to my parents.
My children will feel loved by me when I’m gone, because I left them all these things.
I’m too overwhelmed to let it go (emotional attachment).
I’ll let the kids deal with the stuff after I’m gone.

Here’s the part where I try to put my clients at ease. When in doubt, always have the contents of an estate viewed by a true professional prior to distributing or selling contents. Most times, the heirs are not surprised to learn that much of what mom and dad amassed doesn’t have much value. Some children feel the stuff may be “junk” and are pleasantly surprised to find that some pieces have significant value. Family stories through the years can add to the anticipation that grandfather’s chair is valuable because it is old. Yet, we know age is not the only determining factor of true value.

For every reason listed above, there is a counter-reason to let it go.

Many of your heirs won’t take as much as you would like to give them.
Boomer children already have houses full of stuff; adding more will only fuel marital strife.
Your younger generations appear to want very little but cash assets.
Leaving a huge burden for your children should not be your legacy.
Much of your stuff will be out of style and not genuinely desired by your heirs.
Your heirs may have different lifestyles and your stuff won’t fit those styles.
Many are trying to simplify their own lives, not add more stuff to clean and hold.
If you sell your stuff now, you can purchase other things you would truly enjoy.
These items were treasured by someone else, but not you and not now.

Holding on to possessions, for the sake of not wanting to let them go, can leave a negative impact on those left behind. Gifting valuable items now is a beautiful way to pass along your treasures and watch your heirs enjoy them. Making plans for the distribution of your possessions, while you are still in control of these decisions, is the best plan of action.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.

Condition, Condition, Condition

September 15, 2015 | Julie Hall

When it comes to the worth of heirlooms and antiques, one characteristic of value needs to be understood and it’s not how old the item is. It’s condition. Original condition!

We all know what the word original means: initial, first, earliest, the real thing. It means the appearance of an item has been left intact, the way the artist or creator intended it to be in its original state. No stripping, refinishing, repairing, painting, gluing, drilling holes, polishing, lacquering, etc.

Original to a collector wanting to buy a fine item means they prefer it this way. The mellowing of leather or wood that only the passage of time can accomplish to near perfection, which also demonstrates the piece is true to the period, blemishes included. These blemishes are part of the item’s history. If it could talk, the stories it could tell!

Many seem to be of the mindset that if mother’s tables are antique, they are definitely valuable. This is simply NOT the case; please pass the word along! Age is only one characteristic of value. While it certainly can be a contributing factor of value, many other factors are also evaluated when a professional assigns value. Condition is right up there at the top of the list.

I’m called to an estate to see mom’s antiques, but they are in poor or fair condition. They could be covered in years of nicotine, mold/mildew, or have been continually exposed to humidity or cold. Maybe someone painted the primitive table sage green, or cut down the legs of the dining table to make a nice coffee table. All the owner understands is that these items are old and should put considerable cash in their pocket.

An appraiser sees these items are not in good condition, or the original condition has been altered permanently. Getting it back to a “sellable” condition will take a small miracle, not to mention more money than the piece may actually be worth. These pieces can still be sold and a fixer-upper may want them, but at a fraction of the price people have in their minds. The owner of the pieces gets upset because the pieces are not selling for what they perceived they would sell for. I know … it’s a lot to take in!

If you are downsizing or selling the contents of an estate, look at the items from the perspective of an appraiser or personal property expert. Consider all the flaws and permanent alterations to pieces before setting expectations too high. Otherwise, you might be quite disappointed.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.

How to Stretch Your Hard-Earned Dollar

August 27, 2015 | Julie Hall

The advantages of shopping at estate sales and other great places

We’ve seen some interesting trends in the personal property market over the last few years. Staggering statistics for the aging population means a tidal wave of residential contents, and a soft market has put a pinch on many wallets. Couple this with millions downsizing, simplifying their lives, passing away, divorcing, moving out or the country, etc., and what you have is a healthy buyers market.

My parents used to tell me stories of when they were children during the Depression and what my grandparents did to stretch a buck. Some of their stories were hard to believe, from grandpa making wine in the cellar and selling it for $1 a bottle, to my other grandfather buying thick sheets of leather to re-sole all the kids’ shoes because they could not afford new shoes. Dad even mentioned that, as a small boy, he would run down to the butcher to get the bones before anyone else did, so grandma could make bread and bone broth with vegetables.

Regardless of economic times, we should learn an important lesson from the previous generation and be practical with our money so it goes farther for us, especially when we work so hard to earn it.

Estate sales, yard sales, auctions, and second-hand stores are all wonderful ways to stretch your hard-earned dollar. Estate sales have fabulous items and the widest possible variety of anything you could want or need: furniture, decorative items, tools, jewelry, clothing, antiques, collectibles, etc. (and I do mean et cetera).

Many of these items are gently used or still new in the box. The beauty of these sales is you never know what you might find; the thrill of the hunt is part of the excitement.

Negotiating your price is fun depending on the estate sale professional’s policies. Please be fair-minded when negotiating. After all, the family may very well need the financial assistance from the sale to help with mom’s illness or health care bills.

Here are some advantages for shopping at estate sales:

This is the ultimate in recycling
It helps a family just like yours
Designer/brand name items for much less than retail
Most furniture is made from hardwoods, and well made
Find out-of-print books for avid readers
Hard to find vintage items
Find unique items from around the world
Find older electronics and record albums
You may find a treasure/investment
A great place to find eclectic gifts
Something for everyone

Visit some estate sales this weekend and enjoy yourself! You never know what you will find!

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.

How Will People Remember You?

August 21, 2015 | Julie Hall

When it comes to making arrangements for estate distribution upon one’s death, too many of us are seized with a dramatic disease called procrastination (with a touch of denial). We will all pass away one day; it’s a certainty. But many do nothing about it while they are still very much alive. They think in terms of “if” I die, not “when” I die. Denial makes them procrastinate on very important personal decisions. Should a crisis occur, are you and your loved ones prepared at all?

Procrastination and denial have a remedy called “AWARE.”

A stand for Anguish, Anxiety, even Anger

When a loved one dies and leaves no instructions on what to do with his/her estate and personal possessions, loved ones left behind become angry and resentful at having to mentally and physically handle another person’s lifetime accumulation, especially if nothing was done ahead to prepare and discuss. The frustration, anxiety, and guilt are evident in their voices when they call me to help them dispose of the household possessions.

Alleviate this emotional strain by spending a small amount of time now, when you are mentally and physically able to arrange your affairs yourself. A serious crisis rarely gives you any warning.

W stands for Will/Trust

Don’t leave life without one of these. Your Last Will and Testament/Trust is the wisest document you can possess. Have an attorney help you; template forms may not hold up in the statutory process for distributing assets. Not just for those of wealth, a will is important for every well-prepared individual. You need a will to insure you have designated the rightful beneficiaries and will eliminate other potential problems.

Other estate planning documents to discuss with an attorney include a Durable Power of Attorney, a Healthcare Power of Attorney, and a Declaration of Desire for a Natural Death, better known as a Living Will. The investment of time and money here is well worth it, compared to the anguish you may cause your family and friends without these documents.

A stands for Action

Once you have your will in hand, develop a written plan that lists important people who could help your family or friends after your death. Research and record those you consider to be trusted resources and experts, including their name, address, contact information, and explanation of what they do. Maintain this plan of action with your will, so your family can find this upon your death.

These resources could include your attorney, financial planner, banker, real estate appraiser, personal property appraiser, estate sale professional, realtor, and other experts you trust to consult about a collection you may have (stamps, guns, books, coins, art). Wisely include in your written plan the location of your address book, so out-of-town family and friends can be notified of your death. Always make sure someone you really trust has passwords and keys to your computer, safe, and home.

R stands for Responsibility and Respect

Responsibility is one of the most lasting characteristics you can leave a family member or friend who must close out your affairs after your death. When you have taken personal responsibility to handle your estate ahead of time, you are actually leaving a legacy of kindness and respect for those who must settle your affairs. They will appreciate it and learn by example.

E stands for Educate

Educate yourself by taking a personal inventory and appraisal of your personal property and how you want it distributed. Educate others as to what is valuable to you and find out what may be valuable to them. For example, your daughter might value a chipped ceramic plate that was the platter for family birthday cakes — no monetary value but heaping sentimental value for her. Give away as much in life as you feel comfortable in giving.

Be AWARE of how you want people to remember you when you are no longer here to tell them yourself!

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.

Unforgettable Note We Found in an Estate

August 5, 2015 | Julie Hall

“Please Take Care of This for Me”

Borrowed from Robert N. Test, American poet

“The day will come when my body will be determined by doctors to be without life. When that happens, do not attempt to instill artificial life into my body by the use of a machine. And don’t call it my deathbed. Call it my Bed of Life, and let my body be taken from it to help others lead fuller lives.

Give my sight to the man who has never seen a sunrise, a baby’s face, or the love in the eyes of a significant other.

Give my heart to the person whose own heart has caused nothing but endless days of pain.

Give my blood to a teenager who was pulled from the wreckage of a car, so he might live to see his grandchildren play.

Give my kidneys to one who depends on a machine to exist.

Take my bones, every nerve and muscle, to find a way to make a crippled child walk.

Explore every corner of my brain. Take my cells if necessary, and make them grow, so one day a speechless boy will shout at the crack of a bat and a deaf girl will hear the sound of rain against her window.

Burn what is left and scatter my ashes to the winds to help the flowers grow.

If you must bury something, let it be my faults, my weaknesses, and all prejudice against my fellow man.

Give my sins to the devil; give my soul to God.

If, by chance, you wish to remember me, do it with a kind deed or word to someone who needs it.

If you do all that I have asked, I will live forever.”

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.

You’d Better Sit Down!

July 31, 2015 | Julie Hall

I can’t stress this enough, though I feel like a nag for repeating it often:

A majority of the time, your possessions are not worth what you think they are worth.

My phone rings each day with dozens of calls. But the calls that always make me pause and take a deep breath are those that start telling me what their possessions, or inherited heirlooms, are worth. In fact, a recent client had a great deal of difficulty hearing the real values of her mother’s possessions. I was afraid she would pass out, so I said, “You’d better sit down!”

Allow me to say this where all can see it clearly, in hope of helping as many as possible.

Internet research of items may be completely useless. Many items are not researched correctly, because the average person may not know the correct name or description for the items being researched.
The internet is only a good tool if you properly search for realized prices, not asking prices. Realized prices are what an item sold for. That’s the only figure used to determine fair market value. Someone can ask the sun and the moon for an item; the asking prices on websites are insanely high. One is left to think those items will NEVER be sold at that price in this market.
People hear what they want to hear. Many do not listen, even to an expert. They see a “price” on the internet for $650 and by golly, that’s what their item is worth. No, it’s not! This particular item may actually be selling for $75, making the fair market value $75, not the figure they saw. Sadly, some people are so anchored to their possessions they will not heed the sound judgment of professionals who do this every single day.
Family lore: “The fish you caught was HOW BIG?” All our parents told us for decades that certain pieces were “extremely old and valuable.” Remember, until a professional examines them, conclude that the pieces were cherished by your parents/grandparents, but still may not be worth much. Keep your expectations in neutral. Most of the time, these pieces have more sentimental value than actual value.
The price paid for an item has nothing to do with its value in today’s market. “I paid $5,000 for that.” It doesn’t matter. What does matter is:
1. It is a used item.
2. It may no longer be in style.
3. It may not even be desirable, especially if it’s dark brown or very large (both are out of favor now).
4. No one really wants it.

Try to remember these things brought you or your loved one pleasure. In today’s soft market, there is no way you’ll get thousands of dollars from selling them.

6. Mom collected these for 50 years but they are still not valuable now. We grew up with our mothers drilling into our heads just how valuable her items are, and yes, they were desirable at that time. In the 21st century, homes are desperately wanting to be clutter-free. The younger generations no longer want to crowd furniture surfaces with framed photos, figurines, and paperweights. Boomers are getting rid of these items, hoping to live a simpler life.

The solution to all these problems, and many more, is to find an expert who understands these possessions and the best way to sell them, based on what they know about the market. Always get professional estate assistance before you do anything. Try to be as realistic as possible.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.

What Factors Affect Value?

July 21, 2015 | Julie Hall

We want to believe that our possessions have exquisite value and will bring much money one day when we are ready to sell. We are disappointed to learn that the heirlooms of mom and grandmother are not worth much anymore, despite the family lore. What can affect the current value of personal property?

The Economy

If the economy is soft, the values for most personal possessions on the secondary market are going to suffer, like everything else. Today’s trends are all about simplification, so the market is flooding with traditional household furnishings from our homes and our parents’ homes

Market trends

Are the items currently sought after and desirable to have at this time, or are they just good, usable items?

Value

What is something really worth? Not what you paid for it, and not the value on an old appraisal report. Ultimately, it is worth what someone is willing to give you for it. Here’s where it helps to have a professional who can research your items and guide you towards achieving maximum proceeds. Searching the internet for “values” only produces asking prices, not genuine sales comparables, not what the items actually sold for. Professionals know how to search for your items and what they are currently selling for.

Popularity and Style

An item may be attractive, but it might not have much value. On the other hand, the most unsuspecting, and often unattractive, items may have more value than you know. Much has changed in the marketplace; people have changed and values have changed, along with what’s hot and what’s not.

Changing lifestyles

Traditional, dark “brown furniture” (as it’s called in the industry) does not have the appeal it did for our parents or grandparents. It may be in good condition, but children and grandchildren don’t like the dark brown. They are buying these pieces inexpensively to paint, because the market is saturated with these pieces.

Generational differences

Grandmother’s cherished floral china from the Depression era is completely different from what a 22-year old woman wants today. Generation X and Y want a simple, clean, European look for their homes and no clutter or knick-knacks. They shop at places like IKEA and Pottery Barn. The Boomer is caught somewhere in the middle, still somewhat traditional, not as much as their parents and not as indifferent as their children.

Junk or something more?

Proper identification is the key. The television shows would have you believe there is treasure in every home or estate. While you may find interesting collectibles, not every home contains a treasure of significant monetary value. Yet, you just never know what you could have in your possession.

Law of supply and demand

This law is always in effect, for everything. Too much supply and not enough demand causes the prices to fall, such as all our older loved ones’ glassware, porcelain, and collectibles. They are in abundance in every household, but few truly want them in 2015. On the flip side, anything in demand but in small supply will usually sell higher, because it’s desired and not readily available. The internet makes the world very small. What used to be rare and hard to find is now in abundance on all major online auction sites. Suddenly, there are 1,956 figurines just like mom’s.

We have little control over most of these factors, but that’s why items are no longer commanding what they used to.

Two recommendations from the expert:

Keep your expectations reasonable.
Hire a professional to advise you on values.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.