Where, O Where, Have All the Experts Gone?

September 4, 2014 | Julie Hall

Experts in antique books, stamps, silversmith, woven rugs, Persian rugs, clocks, estate jewelry, advertising, coins, etc. are getting harder to find for several reasons:

They have died.
They are up in years and no longer practice.
They have gone out of business due to lack of interest and sales.
The younger generations aren’t interested in learning the craft of their elders.

Now we are left with a shortage of rich-with-experience “old-timers” in these specialty areas.

How will we be able to identify historic items and other pieces of significance after they are gone?
How will we ever know the stories behind such items?
Without these elders and their expertise, what will we have to teach our children and grandchildren?

This wealth of information has fallen on the deaf ears of the younger generations; now they have no trade to fall back on in life. It’s really sad, but it’s their decision to make.

I was in Arizona a couple of years back and talked with some of the Native Americans. They instantly saw how I lit up holding their silver jewelry, wondering how they achieved a certain shape, scroll, or color. This conversation led to another, when I asked the elder silversmith if he had taught his son and grandson his wonderful skills.

“Neither wanted to learn,” he said. “Now they have their fancy phones and games, but they have no way to make a living. They don’t know much.”

Spotting a weaver, I went over and talked with her as well. You’d be amazed how well a huge smile opens doors. Hers was the same story. All of these middle-aged and older people learned their skills from their parents and grandparents, but very few of their children were interested.

As someone who loves the estate industry, you could say that I study the possessions of those already passed. I wonder how appraisers in the future will be able to do their job, as experts die off.

This Estate Lady is collecting unusual books about all of the topics I mentioned at the top. At the rate everything is being read online, the real books containing rare information will be considered trash one day. I can see some of these books being dumped.

I know what is inside those books is more valuable than the things I appraise. They contain knowledge, and you can’t put a price on that!

Julie Hall, The Estate Lady®, is the foremost national expert on personal property in estates, including liquidating, advising, and appraising. http://www.TheEstateLady.com She is also the Director of American Society of Estate Liquidators®, the national educational and resource organization for estate liquidation. http://www.aselonline.com.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com.

The Ring

August 21, 2014 | Julie Hall

Go ahead and get your tissue box now; I have mine on my lap as I write this. Let me tell you a beautiful story.

An 80-year-old mother knew her health was failing, but she didn’t tell her children how bad it was really getting. Her 82-year-old husband was afflicted with dementia; the disease was just starting to rear its ugly head and become too much for her to handle, seeing her beloved husband of 58 years slip away.

This mom and dad lived far away from their two children and grandchildren by choice. All of their dearest friends were in Florida, and that is where they wanted to spend their golden years together. The only problem was as the years passed, they watched all their friends get sick and pass away one by one, visiting each of them in the nursing homes and hospitals, saying their goodbyes.

Their family loved each other dearly and always remained close in heart through daily phone calls and emails, reminiscing and sending each other “remember whens.” But it was time to call in help and the children intervened, trying to get them closer geographically. Finally, mom agreed. When the middle-aged daughter went for a visit to discuss options and make decisions, the mom again showed the daughter where all their trust and other legal papers were located, to make sure the kids knew where everything could be found. How heartbreaking for the daughter to see her parents decline and become fragile, and equally hard for the mom to discuss her final wishes and personal thoughts with the daughter.

Bury me in this dress, call these people when I die, don’t spend a lot on flowers, etc…

It was a difficult day for mother and daughter; the deed was done and the day dragged long.

The mom got up and went into her bedroom and called the daughter in after her. She presented her daughter with a ring, placing it in her hand and clasping her frail, weathered hand around her daughter’s, she spoke from her failing heart:

It’s yours now. It’s time for you to keep this. I remember when you were a little girl, no more than 5 or 6, you would sneak into our bedroom, open my jewelry box, and try this ring on when you thought no one was watching. You would put it on your index finger, and it was so big for your tiny finger. I was there watching. Mothers always watch and know what’s going on with their children. You loved this bauble then, and I hope you will remember this moment after I’m gone, because I want you to have this. It isn’t worth much, but I always cherish the memory of how you would tiptoe into our room just to try it on, careful to put it back where you found it. Wear it in good health, and may God bless you always for who you are, for the woman you have become, and for what you mean to me. I love you very much and I’m so proud of you.

The daughter was speechless and choked up all at once, trying very hard to be brave, but it didn’t work. She collapsed in front of her mother, knowing the message she was giving her: that she was dying and she had made peace with it.

This story is about my mother, Anne, who died not long after that day, and I was the little girl who adored the big, purple, shiny ring. I will always cherish the ring because of the story behind it, because mom gave it to me in person, and because of the special words that went with it. Mostly, it made me realize I carry her courage inside me; I hope one day I can pass that to my daughter (the ring and the courage).

I wear this ring any time I wear purple. Each time I slip it on my finger, I think of mom handing it to me and how it fits perfectly on my finger now.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com

The Dragonfly

August 7, 2014 | Julie Hall

My garden is demonstrating a last-ditch effort to produce anything fruitful due to the heat, and regrettably, a bug infestation that has taken place as well. I fought valiantly, but eventually the bugs won. A little while ago, I was in the garden picking dozens of cherry tomatoes from my amazing giant tomato plant. It is approximately 10 feet tall and draping all over the place, despite my creative stakes tall enough to support it; I should have pruned it long ago. Stooping under the graceful limbs, heavy laden with small tomatoes I couldn’t wait to gather, I caught sight of her, a huge iridescent dragonfly resting on top of a garden stake about 18 inches from my face.

I don’t really like insects at all, though I realize they are all very necessary to keep nature balanced. But she was different; minding her own business with her beautiful stained glass-looking wings shining in what was left of the day’s sunlight. I said “hello” out loud and she cocked her head towards me. When I cocked my head in the other direction, she did the same thing. If I moved forward, she moved back. If I moved back, she moved forward.

Suddenly, in this big and chaotic world of ours, I found myself totally locked in a dance with her, enjoying a “moment” nature provided for this one-person audience. For a minute, we observed one another. She must have instinctively known I meant her no harm.

What took me aback was the intelligence I experienced in a living thing so small and common that I had never noticed before. She did not demonstrate fear or wariness by my presence. She was not startled or irritated. She was simply in the moment and inquisitive. I wish I could be more like that, instead of always worrying about deadlines and self-imposed pressure.

I also wondered if the dragonfly may be resting. Maybe that was a sign for me to rest too, because my work has kept me juggling so much up in the air for the last year. I went about picking my tomatoes and cucumbers after she flew off; I was left with the very weird sensation that it would be me who missed her, and not the other way around. We really are connected to everything, and sometimes we all need to “take a moment” and learn a lesson from nature.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com

Caveat Venditor

June 19, 2014 | Julie Hall

“Let the Seller Beware” When It Comes to Selling Gold

Pick an industry – any industry – and there will be good and bad people in it. The estate industry is no different. You find dedicated souls who are simply outstanding and go the distance to help their clients, and then you have those who are in it for a quick buck and could care less. You must heed my advice:

SELLER BEWARE!

Sadly, people do get ripped off every day, and more people get taken advantage of when selling gold jewelry than the sale of anything else.

Most people take their jewelry to jewelers, thinking this is the logical place to sell it. While that’s not a bad choice, there are other options. You owe it to yourself and the estate to shop around. Some go to coin shops, antique stores, or private collectors. Try locating places closest to the refinery; you are likely to make more money.

Here are some tips to help you get your fair share:

Have sterling and gold identified as genuine. Do not sell it at this time; just get help in identifying it. Do not sell it in a rush, unless you have to.
Find a local place that is close to a refinery, get a quote, then take it to jewelers. Do research online to see if you can find a local resource. Most jewelers sell to refiners, so you may want to go straight to the source. Have your facts together first. It is worth taking jewelry to multiple places to get the most $$ you can.
Pay attention to daily spot price of gold and silver, http://www.kitco.com. Prices fluctuate throughout the day every day. This site will give you a per ounce price. You need to understand that the per ounce they are referring to is pure bullion, pure gold, pure silver, NOT 14K, 10K, etc. These are not pure, so the spot price will not apply to a handful of 14K jewelry.
The troy ounce is used in the weighing and pricing of precious metals: gold, platinum, and silver. The troy ounce is different from an ounce you would weigh on your kitchen scale. If you get into weighing metals, you will need a jewelers scale that includes troy ounces or “ozt.” You can buy an inexpensive jeweler’s scale online.
Let’s say that gold is $1,300 per ounce. You will not get $1,300 per ounce for your 10K or 14K because it is not pure gold.
Divide today’s gold price from Kitco.com in dollars per ounce by 31.1 to get today’s gold price per gram. There are 31.1 grams in an ounce of gold or silver. If today’s price was $1,300 per ounce, then: 1300 divided by 31.1 = $41.80/gram. Then, multiply by the fineness of the gold:

10K = .4167
14K = .5833
18K = .7500
22K = .9167
24K = 100% gold

So if you have 10K and the price of gold is $1,300 per ounce or $41.80 per gram, then the price of your jewelry is $41.80 x .4167 = $17.41/gram. If you have 10 grams of 10K at $17.41/gram, your scrap gold is worth $174.10.

Remember, this is for illustrative purposes. The gold still has to be tested/assayed to determine the true percentage of gold.

TIPS:

Keep gold coins separated, because they have numismatic value, as well as metal value.
You can purchase your own gold testing kit, but it will be tested again when you go to sell it.
Weigh your items by grouping together (10K, 14K, etc.). Use a loupe to look inside the piece to find a mark. Not all pieces are marked; this is why they should be tested.
Scrap gold dealers in store fronts (“We Buy Gold”) will likely buy from you at 30-60% LESS than the gold’s worth. A jeweler will usually pay more than this.
Be aware that often gemstones set in jewelry are not included in the offer. Those seem to just go along with the gold, which doesn’t seem fair to me. IF it is a large stone, you may want to have it removed from the setting BEFORE you scrap the gold. Please have the stone identified!
Private collectors may offer a very fair price, if you can find them. Know the worth before you sell.
Gold refiners pay 90% and sometimes more, but they may have a minimum weight requirement.
Old dental gold is usually between 8K and 18K; it must be tested as well.

If you dislike math, this helpful website for gold scrap weight conversion and melt value calculator will do the figuring for you: http://www.silverrecyclers.com/calculators/gold_calculator.aspx.

For a list of reputable dealers in the U.S., see US Mint page on recommended coin and gold buyers: http://www.usmint.gov/mint_programs/american_eagles/index.cfm?action=lookup.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com

The Downside of Online Auction Sites

June 12, 2014 | Julie Hall

Aside from the ever-increasing fees that have hurt the “little guy” trying to make a decent living or extra income, there is nothing wrong with online auction sites. In fact, they have opened our eyes to a whole new world we never knew existed just a few short years ago. We can easily shop globally from the confines of our desk to find comparable items, best prices, and unique finds. Our online reach can take us anywhere. That’s the good news.

Anyone can post anything online, often without knowing what the gismo is, what it’s called, with little accountability for errors or condition issues, and certainly without understanding the values. That’s the bad news.

From the perspective of an appraiser, online auctions bring income to millions who ordinarily would not have that income, but there are pros and cons to consider.

Back in the day before these sites, an item could legitimately be called “rare and unusual” and might sell for $1,000. Today when you search for the same item online, suddenly there are 2,193 of them across the world, ranging in price from $5.99 to $5,000.

You are witnessing the flooding of the market. In addition, prices that are either too low or too high are hurting the market.

Because we are all connected online now, there is very little rarity, not many surprise “finds,” and no uniformity, as prices are all over the board. It is up to the buyer to beware and purchase carefully.

With so many of the same or similar gismos being listed, we must:

Give thought to what that has done to values (and it isn’t good).
Recognize that as elderly collectors pass away and someone attempts to sell the entire collection online (or even at a local auction house), they will inadvertently be flooding the market. When selling a large collection, a handful of hard-to-find pieces will sell well, but the remainder will sell far lower than expected.

Too much of the same/similar items being dumped on the market and listed online (supply), and not enough people to buy them (demand), drives prices and values downward.

Are we shooting ourselves in the foot? Yes, but we’re in too deep to make any serious changes now. We’ve become accustomed to the lure of sales and discounts.

With online auction fees climbing, one has to ask if it is actually worth it, between the soft economy and the fees that eat your profit. Yet, to many people, it is a source of income they need, to make ends meet. A Catch-22 situation, indeed.

Other challenges with online auctions are:

It takes the fun out of being at a physical auction where buyers get caught up in bidding wars, and items may actually sell for more in person than an online auction.
Online auctions take the “social” out of attending local auctions. When you stop and think about it, online auctions are “anti-social.”
Tangible experience. With an online auction, you can’t personally examine the item(s) you would like to bid on. You just look at photos and bid accordingly. With a local auction, you can preview, handle, examine, test, etc. to be sure your bid is where it should be.

As a result, many items from online auctions end up being returned because:

The seller did not properly describe the item, or,
The pictures did not represent the item accurately, or,
The buyer is fickle.

Online auctions are neither positive or negative. They certainly do boost viewers and more people are shopping from their homes. But as an appraiser, I wanted to offer some unique thoughts into the world of online auctions.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com

The Emotional Porter

June 4, 2014 | Julie Hall

When I pack for a pleasure trip, I only allow myself to bring one piece of luggage. I traveled for many years and made a habit of running for my plane in high heels and skirts (way back when). Now that I am older, I do everything in my power to lighten my load, wear sensible shoes, and give my aching back a break. I can’t wait to check my bag, sit down, and relax.

I think many of us lug around our emotional baggage on a daily basis and never bother to “check” it. Maybe we don’t know how to, or maybe we just forget, so we end up dragging it with us wherever we go. It gets rather tiring, doesn’t it?

In my business of helping clients sort through estates, after a loved one has moved to assisted living or has died, I see many children/heirs carry a lot of baggage with them, to the point of personal detriment. I realize that we are not at our personal best when these situations occur, but even after months and years of not making proper decisions, we still carry our emotional baggage wherever we go. It then becomes a monkey on our back, and we get angry and even resentful. It chokes our spirit because we don’t know how to heal it.

This emotional baggage comes from a place of not dealing with our stuff ahead of time, before the loss.

Not speaking our truth,
Not making amends,
Not having that conversation when we could have,
Not asking the questions to get the answers we want,
Not healing wounds that could have been healed.

We forget to forgive ourselves for whatever is eating at us!

Besides all that, I see clients feeling guilty and taking possessions they don’t really want. It only means we have more to carry, or more for our children to carry. Life is hard enough.

We don’t need to lug around someone else’s sentiment or prized possessions.

That was their desire, not ours.

On some deep level, we must consider it our penance to drag around this baggage, like the ghost, Jacob Marley, in “A Christmas Carol” showing Scrooge all the heavy chains he must now carry, due to the choices he made in life. It doesn’t have to be like that; release yourself!

I see many children/heirs carry a lot of baggage with them, to the point of personal detriment. Keeping too much stuff can cause divorce, tension, fighting, resentment, and anger among our still-living family. It’s just not worth it!

Some would argue that everything they kept was sentimental, but you can’t squash mom’s household of stuff into your already-full household of stuff and expect everything to be ok. There is only so much you can keep; it should never cause strife among siblings, spouses, or children.

Holding on to grandmother’s or dad’s possessions are not a mandate, not something you have to do. It’s something you want to do. Seriously edit your selections as you do. If in doubt, listen to your inner voice and pass on the item. Take a photo of it and pass it on.

Don’t be pushed, nudged, guilted, obliged, forced, or coerced by any person, any memory, any ghost, or more importantly, yourself.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com

5 Regrets People Make on Their Deathbed

May 28, 2014 | Julie Hall

NOT ONE OF THEM HAS TO DO WITH STUFF!

“Nurse Reveals the Top 5 Regrets People Make on Their Deathbed” http://topinfopost.com/2014/05/12/top-5-regrets-people-make-on-their-deathbed

In the end, it comes down to you preparing to meet your Maker. I have felt incredibly blessed and humbled after watching a loved one die. It is a process of making peace with everything and everyone, before shutting down the shell that carried us so well through life. It is obvious to me that the farthest thing from their minds were their prized, earthly possessions. It is those of us who are left behind that struggle with the stuff, often transferring our affection for the person to their sentimental object(s). Sometimes, we might even think, “Mom or dad would never forgive me if I gave that away,” or “Grandma would be rolling in her grave if I didn’t keep this.”

I don’t think that’s the case. At all.

I think what we may find in the above article is a slice of human clarity. It’s a glimpse into the world of someone who is getting ready to leave it. This glimpse focuses on human interaction and the many decisions we made along the way, and the things we could have/should have done differently. I think it offers the reader food for thought about our very real, very human interactions, and how we could have a better life or how we could offer a better life for others.

In the end, regrets are not what you take with you. Nor will you take your money, your possessions or collectibles or cars. All you take is what you entered the world with, plus all the love you accrued along the way.

The only thing we should be concerned with is leaving a legacy that would make those who know and love us, know and love us more. Go change your world!

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com

What is “Weighted” Silver?

May 23, 2014 | Julie Hall

For many years, I have been appraising and advising on all kinds of residential contents, but one item has always eluded my imagination. So, I thought I would share it with you in the form of a little “Show and Tell” now that I have a good example.

When people think of sterling silver, they think it has value. They would be correct, but in some cases, the value is not necessarily as great as one might think. Because the spot price of silver is currently down, many people are collecting scrap silver or scrapping family silver pieces for quick cash. This is done by weight only, so families may think that mom’s candlesticks are very heavy and therefore must be worth a fortune!

What most people don’t realize is that many pieces that mom or grandma have are “weighted” sterling. If you look at the base of the sterling candlesticks, footed bowls, or candelabra, you will see a base that is actually filled with cement, a composite of some sort. The sterling silver over that base is actually foil thin. If you turn over the piece, you will see it says “weighted silver.”

This piece was broken and found in the trash.

This is what the weight looks like with top layer of silver removed.

The bottom of the piece, which will often say "Weighted Silver" or in this case, "Reinforced with Cement" — The bottom of the piece, which will often say “Weighted Silver” or in this case, “Reinforced with Cement”

The end product ... Nothing but foil thin pieces of actual sterling silver — The end product … Nothing but foil thin pieces of actual sterling silver

I peeled the actual foil-thin silver off, so you could see the “weight” was not silver at all, but just a lump of resin/cement. By the time you peel off the good silver, it weighs about a third of an ounce (if that), or approximately $6.60 in scrap silver, because the weight was removed from this broken base. If the piece had the top portion, it would have been worth more. I wanted to demonstrate that scrap silver is not that easy to accumulate; you have to know what can be scrapped and what can’t.

I hope you enjoyed this. I never knew what the inside of one of these candlesticks actually looked like!

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com

The Permission to Let Go

May 7, 2014 | Julie Hall

For more than two decades, I have cleaned out other people’s estates and enjoyed the reward of knowing we really do make a difference in people’s lives. As complicated and contentious as the dis-assembly of a loved one’s estate can be, I have learned that the issues that arise during the process come from much more than grief or even greed.

When I am consulting with a family – usually children who are dealing with the aftermath of losing their parent(s) – I can see their very personal struggle, trying to decide what to keep and what to let go. Many deal with guilt issues and feel compelled to hold on to the items mom so dearly cherished. I can see that the children do not cherish these items; they become resentful at having to bring them home, even though they have no room for them.

What most people need is permission.

Permission to surrender, to relinquish, to let go and find a new home for these items.
Permission to accept that these are not the kind of things you may want to keep for yourself or the grandchildren.
Permission to not pass the buck to the next generation.

When you boil it all down, it seems to be the one issue the kids don’t even realize they are experiencing, until I say, “It’s ok to let go of it.” They know instinctively that I know what they are thinking. Most of the time, a look of awareness hits them, and they just say, “Thank you. I really needed to hear that. How did you know I needed someone to give me permission?”

But the “permission to let go” affects many areas of our lives, not just personal possessions.

It finally dawned on me after living on this planet for over 5 decades. Most of life seems to be about embrace, surrender, and then oddly enough, letting go. It just seems that life has been a series of fabulous blessings, ups and downs, disappointments, tremendous joys, profound sadness, frustrations, surrender, and …. when the time is right, letting go.

Letting go of your small child headed to kindergarten for the first time.
Letting them take the car keys.
Letting them go off to college.
Letting go of our own youth as time marches on.
Letting go of a loved one at the end of their life.

It is part of the cycle of life.

It takes introspection, strength, mindfulness, awareness, and while we are at it, a few thousand tears.

I’m writing this as I hear the jingle of keys. My teenager just shouted up to me, “Bye, Mom!”, jumping in the car along with her newfound freedom, a big smile, and a spring in her step. It is a bittersweet thing and an almost impossible balance: to be happy for her, on the one hand. Yet seeing the beautiful adult emerging, I know I must let go of the child in her, even though I don’t really want to. Here come a few more tears …

But even I know that all butterflies take flight when they are ready. We must also be mindful of all the letting go and sacrifices our previous relatives have done for us.

You probably know someone, if not yourself, who is in the process of letting go of something or someone. Letting go can either be a huge struggle or a freeing experience. I hope it is the latter for each of us.

Letting go. What a beautiful gift, if we can find the strength!

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com

Know When to Hold ’em BEFORE You’ve Sold ’em

April 18, 2014 | Julie Hall

It is not unusual to meet with families sorting through an estate on their own and making serious mistakes. Through no fault of their own, they are following their logic. Since they don’t have the benefit of knowing the correct process and sequence of things, knowing the industry, collectibles, antiques, and the overall market, they soon find themselves “guessing” and that is a very bad thing to do.

Families, executors, and attorneys hire estate professionals so we can guide the family in knowing what has value, what doesn’t, what is sellable, what is not, options for selling, resources for selling, what to throw away, and what to keep. This is what we Estate Consultants do to maximize proceeds and offer peace of mind to our clients, knowing they are making the right decisions.

Let me tell you a story about what just happened.

I love sterling silver rings. Besides wearing them, they are a good investment as a precious metal. I had been watching a large lot of rings on eBay and won it at a very fair price. When the rings arrived, I looked at them and found a huge surprise. One ring stood out; I knew instantly it was Imperial jade, and one of the largest pieces of Imperial jade I had ever seen. Even a small slab of this jade is very expensive and sought after. The setting was platinum and not sterling. It was, at the very least, a $1,500 ring thrown in with $5 sterling rings.

Someone did not do their homework or did not take the time to do enough homework.

I attempted to contact the seller on eBay, but they never replied.

Moral to the story:

Haste makes waste. It is worth hiring an expert to avoid hasty, and costly, mistakes. No one can possibly know everything. Bringing in professional help is an inexpensive insurance policy that you are making the right decisions for the distribution and dissolution of a loved one’s personal property.

No part of The Estate Lady® blogs, whole or partial, may be used without Julie Hall’s written consent. Email her at Julie@TheEstateLady.com